Thursday, 28 June 2012


I know a man who nothing moves. When you offend him in anyway, he just sighs and moves on. The strange thing about him is that you would not even see any reaction neither will his emotions betray him. Carefully guarded he remains at all times and in all places. So I decided to keep a closer watch but my watch still yielded no negative reports. I then took a step further by interviewing his kids because I know at least there is no one who is quite immune to the tantrum of kids but I got a stunning answer.
Daddy never says anything when he is angry. He would rather smile and then move on but when he wants to say anything, his words truly hurt. Unknown to me, the kids being kids went to their father and then let the cat out of the bag by telling their dad that they were asked questions about him and he called me on phone. The first thing he did was to laugh and then told me that I should have come directly to him. I couldn’t come directly to you, I retorted simply because I wanted to know if this outward way of living was false. We are living in a world where people step on toes, bosses want to outshine their subordinates, friends looking for ways to outsmart their friends and yet in this kind of world, over the last ten years I have known you to keep your cool in the face of any challenge. That I found to be truly remarkable and I set out to look for answers that could change my perception.
He said I have no secret but I have come to understand that whenever things happen, it is important I keep my peace. If I don’t, I cannot make the right decision and I may have to regret my actions later. He continued by saying that words are heavy and he considers words as a gift; moreover you should be careful how you use them or they will come back to haunt you later. This he told me he learnt long ago and ever since it became a part of him, he and people around him have enjoyed better business dealings and better relationships have been developed.
He concluded by telling me that if I want to be truly great, I should ensure that when things happen I do not lose my peace. Ever since that conversation, I found a new way of approaching issues and it is something that can truly give you an edge. Make no mistake, it is not easy to do this as the way we are wired was not built to accept dung hurled at you but you can surely take a few moments to search within you and find an appropriate response if there must be any.
Have a simple formula
MUST RESPOND               =             RESPOND APPROPRIATELY

All the best

Wednesday, 27 June 2012


During the course of living on this planet, a lot of questions pop up in our heads and among these many questions comes this all important question of why me? Why does it always have to be me to do this or that, experience this or that, go to this place or that? It’s a question that makes us feel singled out of a pool of people for either good things or bad things. This is what I have come to observe: When we are singled out for good things, we find it easy to quickly come to terms with whatever is happening and accept the accolades that is being poured on us but when it’s the reverse, heads are usually bowed down and people are dejected that they have been singled out for terrible things.

Did you know that being in the positive mood could help answer that question faster than you expect and getting around to believe that all things happen for a reason could be just the key to resolving whatever challenge it is. Think of it like this: if all that happens to you are the good things, do you think you will learn enough about life and how to pull through this current situation that is making you to say why me? You may be tempted to say yes but have you not seen enough babies at the seat of power or those who even have no clue about what to do every time things happen around them? It’s not bad not to have a clue about some things but it’s bad not to have a clue about every single thing around you.

The experience you are passing through now is to make you stronger and be more adept at handling issues as they crop up. One thing we often forget as well is that this could have happened not just for your sake alone but for the sake of someone around you now or who will come around you later in life. When you ask the question why me, remember that it has to be someone so why not stand up, face the challenge in an upbeat mode and force the change through so that it can become an added experience later in life. I have learnt to always ask myself; what is the positive I can see in this thing that has just happened. Most times when I look hard enough, I will see a positive and by the time I focus on the positives, ideas of what to do will just start flooding the mind and this happened simply by dwelling on the positives.

So I would rather you change your question you ask when things happen from WHY ME to WHY NOT ME? This would help you brood on the positives and give you the IRON HEART of a WORLD CHANGER. You can surely live in a different way by learning this principle.

All the best


Hello All,
Did you know you can get the best of your friendships and relationships simply by using the two letters stated above? “OK”. Too simple and too vague you may be tempted to say but just spare me a few minutes of your time to read and digest what I have written and within the next few days, you will be glad that you did read this article.
A long time ago, it was a part of me to impress what I felt was right on others. When I felt they were not doing things the right way, a part of me will strongly desire to convince them of the need for a re-direction and possibly the need to change permanently. In as much as this was sometimes right, I noticed that too much energy was expended in trying to correct an already formed mind which in turn gave room to needless arguments. The arguments also had its downside in that they could lead to severe headache and most importantly a strain in the relationship. Come to think of it, the whole essence as I was to discover later was to ensure this person towed a better line and gave up a warped view of the issue being discussed. So I thought to myself: was this worth the whole trouble? Was another not being created in the process of trying to resolve one?
So I had to learn the hard way and discovered that simply saying ok to so many things would make things move along. Once you state your point and the person revolts by saying the opposite, simply say ok just so that the conversation can move along. You will discover what a wise way of living this is in that it will save you a whole lot of stress in dealing with humans along the way. Also, in case someone wants you to do something and you feel that it’s not the best decision, if you think saying no will lead to a conversation of close to one hour on a subject that is so frivolous, please employ the OK FORMULA.
Then the last thing I will like to point out is that simply because you said ok does not mean that you entirely agree with the person. It only means that at that point in time, you want peace to reign, you want to save yourself some stress, you want to preserve the relationship, you want to massage someone else’s ego by simply saying ok and doing what you intend to do. This formula can be used on anyone you can think of and it will achieve tremendous results for you along the way.
Remember that you will have a lot of challenge along the way as you practice as it is not easy to learn a new way of doing things. Just tag along by simply using the ok formula and you will get the best out of your relationships.

Monday, 25 June 2012


Joern Pollex - Bongarts/Getty Images

Manchester United (England) announced earlier this month that an agreement had been reached with Borussia Dortmund (Germany) for the transfer of talented Japanese midfielder Shinji Kagawa.
I was impressed when I read that the club offered him the Number 7 shirt which was made famous by the likes of Eric Cantona, David Beckham, Cristiano Ronaldo and was worn by Michael Owen last season but the midfielder turned down the offer as he wants to prove himself before taking such honour.
This proves that this young man is just out to play the football game we all love and would rather humbly grow into such a stature.

He was quoted as saying “I’ve just joined the team and haven’t accomplished anything yet. I want to make a name for myself at United on my own terms”. He further stated that it is an exciting time for him and he can’t wait to meet his team and start playing.
Go on Shinji!!! We can’t wait for you to wear your preferred shirt number (even if you later choose the number 7 shirt) and take on the Premier League with your exceptional talent and humility.


This sounds too good to be true right? I know and actually it is a bit difficult to practice but highly achievable. It is also a good way of getting things done in the world we live today as there are several reasons to hate and genuinely dislike people. People will always give you reasons to like or dislike them and the sooner you realize that the better. I would always salute a boss of mine who taught me that people would always be people and before they ever offend you, think in your mind that you have forgiven them. So when they eventually display their true human nature, you remember that at some point you told yourself that this person will surely offend me but I will definitely forgive whatever wrong the person might have done.
Think of it like this: why would you stay away from a place where you so much believe that you can get something you desperately need simply because someone who once offended you works or lives around that domain even though it’s not the person that will give you what you want. Why would you choose to avoid a classmate who you know can help you with your academics simply because of a squabble that happened 3 years ago? Why will you avoid been on the same team with a colleague at work simply because of some misunderstanding that even those in the office cannot remember? Doing all these things simply takes you via a longer route to getting your things achieved and frustrates neutrals who are observing.
This is why I am proposing that when people offend you, let it go however hard it is and then just remember that saying “Keep your friends close and your enemies closer”. Operate in a free spirited manner and then move on. The snag however is that once they do something to hurt you, do not keep your head out to be hung a second time but you can surely hold out the hand for a shake.
With this principle, you will get the best out of your colleagues and many other relationships you will build along the way.
Resolve to be a friend of all and an enemy of none


Tick! Tick!! says the clock, tick! Tick!! What you have to do, do quick. The old nursery rhyme still communicates effectiveness today as it did the first time I heard it. Little did I know in my small mind then that the Rhyme my teacher was forcing us all to learn what would be an integral part of advancing in life. Many things require you to tick along as you go and since the world is not waiting, you need to move along in other to keep up with appointments. The good news about all of this is that things need to get done and they need to be done on time but the bad news is that the things you need to get done cannot wait for you because there are concrete timelines for them to get done. Even when you think they can be done at your own time, the idea is that when you finish, you will discover that you are too late as someone else already got it done or there is no need for it anymore.
Some people prefer to postpone what can be done today till tomorrow and the major reason is that the people want to have fun now and set the work aside to be done at a later time. I came across a few points of recent and we can learn from the points.
  • ·         If you set out to achieve a lot of things, there is the likelihood that you may not get them all done but if you learn to itemize the things that need to get done and then allocate time frame to the things that need to be done, you will achieve a lot faster during the day.
  • ·         You also need to learn to prioritize your tasks. Identify the importance of each task and prioritize them so that you do the most important ones first and do the least important ones last.
  • ·        Get out of your comfort zone. The human being has a soul and it is this soul that makes you crave for entertainment so we need to understand that till the day we are no more, your desire to get entertained would always be there. In essence, the tendency is to feel like relaxing when there is work to be done. Remember that entertainment can wait but the work cannot wait. It is always easier to finish the work first and then relax later. That way, you will have more time to relax and you will be relaxing when your body actually needs to relax.
  • ·         Always get yourself in the work mode. Long ago was when manna fell from heaven and men needed to pick them up from the earth to eat. If you see food on the floor today, will you eat it? So why not set that body of yours to get in the work mode at all times so that the food can be available on your table and you can then decide what you want to eat and how you want to eat.
  •       Try to evaluate yourself each day. Before I go to bed each night, I ask myself these questions: what did I set out to achieve today? Did I achieve all? If I didn’t, why didn’t I achieve all? When you get answers to all these questions, try to improve the following day.
Remember that you will stumble as you give it a try but if you remain consistent and true to this principle, you will go very far.
I leave you with one of my greatest weapons today and that is Delay is truly dangerous
Have a great week